Teaching young South Africans how to lose, then how to win

2026-03-17 - 06:43

Life comprises building blocks that shape us into who we become, who we are in the present, and the waypoints along the way that either challenge or ease the journey. Along the way, we acquire the skills and gather the tools that accompany us on this adventure. Krugersdorp model agency and finishing school owner Samantha Carelse said her life’s mission is to contribute positively to the paths people take. Her tools are the catwalk, the pose and the pageant crown. But these, she said, are no more than just that. The real work lies in shaping confidence and a sense of self-worth, a philosophy far removed from the bling dresses and styled suits donned for display. “It’s not about the pageants or the glamour,” she said, explaining that the real value lies in the kind of mark one leaves behind. “It’s about the imprint that we can be making.” Carelse, 39, has spent more than two decades in the modelling and pageantry industry. Titles came early and often. “I’ve won many titles,” she said. But she does not measure success by trophies because, for her, the lesson lies elsewhere. “I teach my students how to lose first,” she said, noting that how a person responds to disappointment often matters more than how they handle success. ‘It’s how you respond to disappointment’ Her own life story and trauma during her formative years shaped that perspective. She said she was sexually abused over a prolonged period, something that affected how she saw herself and how she engaged with the world around her. There was a time when she tried to disappear rather than be seen. “I hid myself,” she said. “I wore baggy clothes because I didn’t want people to notice me.” Knowing how to win means understanding how to lose – Carelse. Picture: Supplied Modelling, she said, gave her a different perspective on herself and her place in the world. It was not about perfection, but about acceptance. “You come to understand that it’s not about being perfect,” she said. “It’s about being imperfectly perfect.” Her business, Vogue Catwalk Models, sees around 60 young people pass through her studio every year, many from underprivileged or income-challenged households. Carelse said the lessons go far beyond runway basics and learning how to strike a pose. “It’s about confidence and self-worth,” she said. “Young people need to know who they are and what they stand for before anything else.” It becomes a process of self-discovery. Discovering yourself In today’s economic climate, where opportunities are limited and confidence is often lacking, she said the platform becomes more than just a creative outlet or a pastime. “It gives them a voice,” she said, explaining that students learn to approach people, speak about their ideas and ask for support. In that process, they begin to understand how to build something of their own. “They learn entrepreneurship,” she said, pointing to skills such as handling money, presenting ideas and managing themselves in different environments. Learning the catwalk can be a metaphor for life’s journey. Picture: Supplied ALSO READ: Why Gen Z fears phones Students are responsible for sourcing their own sponsorships and managing campaigns while competing in pageants. “It’s about developing the whole person,” Carelse said. Her passion runs deep, and in between, Carelse has started studying toward a degree in psychology to further equip herself to help others. “When they come into my space, it must be safe,” she said. “You have to consider their mental well-being as well. That is why I want to gain a deeper understanding of how I can help our youth, in particular.” Life skills are the purpose Carelse said that while not everyone becomes a supermodel, the outcomes of learning life skills such as confidence and communication often manifest elsewhere. A former student recently contacted her after securing a job and shared how she had drawn on what she learned in the studio. “She told me she walked into the job interview remembering everything she had learnt about posture, confidence, communication and how to carry herself,” Carelse said. “That matters more than any pageant crown.” Carelse preps for another modelling class. Picture: Supplied For Carelse, the impact is measured in those moments. “If I can make a difference in one person’s life, the ripple effect will follow,” she said. The rule of thumb she teaches her students, whether they are 16 or 60, is simple: life is a journey, and you can become whomever you want to be. “Be the impossible,” she said. NOW READ: Gen Z artist Rayne: ‘Music is my oxygen’